As you are making your list of New Year Resolutions with goals to lose weight, exercise more, spend less, save more, and get organized…don’t forget to add your Relationship Resolutions. These are resolutions to reconnect with people you haven’t talked with in a long time, attempts to mend broken relationships, and commitments to growing relational intimacy with the people you are in daily contact with.
We know that strong and healthy relationships with other people help us stay healthy both emotionally and physically. Social networking has made staying connected to people easier than ever, but how many of these connections are actual relationships? You may have 435 friends on Facebook and 352 people following you on Twitter, but how many of those people could you actually call if you needed something? How many do you actually get together for lunch with on a regular basis?
3 Relationship Resolutions to Consider Adding to Your List:
Reconnect: Has a job moved you away from friends and family? Has a romantic relationship caused you to let go of some friendships that you once cherished? If so, why not make a resolution to reconnect with people you have a history with. Facebook may be the tool you can use to reconnect, but resolve to go beyond postings on Facebook and take steps to talk on the phone, plan to visit on vacation, or get lunch together every week or month to stay connected. Reconnecting with someone you share a history with will give you a sense of feeling grounded and safe, especially when life gets challenging.
Reach Out to Repair: Think of people you have had disagreements with that ended your relationship with them… Are you both waiting for the other one to apologize? Do you miss having him or her in your life? Don’t waste another year letting anger or pride stand in the way of restoring a relationship with someone you care about. Consider making a resolution to reach out and attempt to repair the relationship by making a phone call or writing a letter from the heart. Even if the relationship is not restored, you will feel better and have peace of mind knowing you have done your part to reach out.
Renew: What about the people you live with, work with, and spend time with on a daily or weekly basis… Take some time to assess the state of these relationships and consider making resolutions to renew how you value them. Are you and your spouse enjoying a weekly date night? When is the last time you did something with your kids that involved everyone turning their phones off and enjoying time together? How often do you notice what a co-worker is doing well and take time to praise them for it? Have you ever invited your neighbors over for dinner?
Relationship Resolutions are perhaps the most important ones to add to our list for the new year because we all need each other for support, fulfillment, and overall emotional and physical wellbeing. If you find yourself wanting to make relationship resolutions, but are struggling with reconnecting, reaching out, or renewing relationships – consider seeking the help of a counselor who can work with you to accomplish your goals. When we maintain healthy relationships, we will most likely be more successful at accomplishing all of our New Year Resolutions.